When I thought about how I expected birth to go, a lot of scenarios played out in my head--most of them worst case. What actually happened had never once entered my mind.
To give some context, on Friday Peter went on vacation with his brother, cousin, and friend to Vegas and was planning on returning Sunday night. I had a sushi and sleepover night planned with my girl friends for Friday and then I was going to get last minute things done for the baby ( car seat install, hospital bag, type out birth plan, thank you cards). I was looking forward to both of us having a relaxing last weekend.
So Friday night, my three friends and I had dinner, grabbed some snacks at whole foods, chatted for a bit and of course joked about how funny it would be if I went into labor. I was 37w1d and I knew my chances were slim to none so at that point, it was still safe to joke about. We went to bed and I breathed through a few Braxton hicks like I'd done for the past few weeks and then fell asleep. I vaguely remember a large contraction right before I woke up to a feeling of water trickling at 5:45. I would repeat this thought over the next few hours: there's no way that I'm going into labor and even if I am, I have hours of mild labor ahead of me. I then released a ton of fluid and changed my mental state to: ok I'm in labor technically but I know that doesn't mean that I need to rush to the hospital. So I went to my friend's room to calmly announce I'd be going home and not to worry about me when a contraction hit me with enough force that I couldn't speak. After it subsided, it hit me that Peter was gone and I was going to have to go it alone and I wasn't prepared for the baby and I started to shake uncontrollably. By that point all my friends had woken up and were freaking out too. So ironically, that calmed me down enough to focus on what I'd do next.
I called Peter and told him he would probably have to fly back but to wait to buy the ticket until I knew I was for sure going to have the baby (totally still in denial). Then my friends and I caravanned up to my house to pack the hospital bag. I showered, we bought Peter a ticket (plane ETA was 12:15), and was still proud of how I was handling my contractions; they were coming a bit erratically but generally every few minutes and lasting a little under a minute long. I thought I might even have time to do a load of laundry and bake the nurses some cookies when they started to become really intense and last longer than a minute. My doula had told me that I would know it's truly progressive labor when they last about a minute and fifteen seconds and so I decided I should probably go to the hospital. I called her at this time but she didn't answer and I decided to call her again once I got settled in at the hospital. This was around 8am.
My friend drove me to the hospital while the others grabbed some breakfast and met up with one of my coworkers to get my birthing ball I had been sitting on at work. We get to the hospital around 8:30 and the contractions intensified. But I was still able to work through them up until I got on the bed to get monitored. All of a sudden they started hitting me super hard and fast with hardly any break in between them and became REALLY INTENSE. I was bewildered. It felt like how people had described transition. I couldn't breathe and I couldn't recuperate between them. The nurse told me I was 3.5 cm dilated and I knew that generally, first births take around 12 hours to get through active labor, so I had no idea how I would be able to do 10 more hours. I was especially lost without Peter there. I decided to get an epidural and felt pretty bad that I was abandoning a natural birth at only 3.5 cm and worried that it would slow me down too much. They gave me the epidural around 10 and shortly afterwards, the nurse declared I was at a 6. So on the one hand, it was like no wonder I was in so much pain. On the other hand, I thought, without the epidural slowing things down Peter might not make it back in time.
For the next two hours, my friends and I chatted and napped. My in-laws came down and said hi and then left to go pick Peter up at the airport. The nurse had told me that she would check me every 2 hours and to expect another centimeter for each 1-2 hours. Around noon I began feeling the contractions again but nothing like they were before. I waited a half hour and then asked her whether I should be feeling them. She checked me and surprised, said that I was at a 10.
I called Peter and told him as soon as he arrived, I could start pushing even though I could hardly believe it. I felt like it was way too soon and I wasn't prepared and once again, I was blessing the epidural for giving me a few more minutes to mentally prepare. Peter rushed in the room at 12:45 and we did a few practice pushes with the nurse and then waited again for my doctor to arrive. She got there a little after 1:00 and at that point, things became very real. I was laughing because my three friends were perched on the sofa to my left, just watching like it was a movie. My MIL filmed behind me and Peter was holding my leg. So then I mentally prepared myself for maybe an hour of pushing since I couldn't feel anything but apparently the baby wanted OUT. At 1:27, she exited my uterus for good. Hooray!
Basically I never expected to have a fast labor. I also never thought Peter wouldn't be there. And I especially wasn't prepared to have my friends there. But it was really a great birth and I felt so amazing afterwards. I was super happy that I was able to use my breathing to stay in control for as long as I did, I LOVED the epidural, I loved that I had a few hours to laugh and talk with my friends, and then I was happy that she came out without me needing to go on pitocin or undergo surgery. And I'm loving these sweet calm first few days (praying that they continue!) with just her and Peter and me. It is hard to tell her personality right now but she calms easily and you can't ask for more from a newborn :)
I am also loving post partum recovery. I know that sounds weird but it's been so awesome to start to feel like my body is back. I told Peter that even before I started showing, I was always acutely aware that there was another person inside of me.
Also awesome is how light she is. I am currently holding her cradled in my left arm while typing with both hands. I am pretty sure I won't be able to do this for more than a week :)
I am going to print and bind this blog into a book for her so this will likely be my last post. It has been the best 9 month project though and when I print these, I will include everyone's comments. I have appreciated all the advice and love and want her to be able to read them when she's older.
Anyways, you can find me posting on our family blog now http://tewfamily.wordpress.com/
Monday, March 19, 2012
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Dilation and Effacement
I'm dilated to a 2, 80% effaced, and baby is at a -2 station. So basically she could come tonight or in five weeks. Hooray :)
My doctor did a little cervical stretch while she was examining me and while I doubt it will put me into labor, there is always the chance. It wasn't painful at all but then again, it wasn't a true membrane strip/sweep. I have no idea what we'll do if I do start contracting because Peter is on vacation until Sunday and I really really really really don't want him to come home early. He has told me that the birth is more important, and ok, it is :) but having one last sunny weekend with his friends is something he deserves and I'd be sad if he missed out.
I still don't think she'll come until after her due date but it was exciting to hear that the baby has dropped and everything is progressing as it should.
My doctor did a little cervical stretch while she was examining me and while I doubt it will put me into labor, there is always the chance. It wasn't painful at all but then again, it wasn't a true membrane strip/sweep. I have no idea what we'll do if I do start contracting because Peter is on vacation until Sunday and I really really really really don't want him to come home early. He has told me that the birth is more important, and ok, it is :) but having one last sunny weekend with his friends is something he deserves and I'd be sad if he missed out.
I still don't think she'll come until after her due date but it was exciting to hear that the baby has dropped and everything is progressing as it should.
37 Week Stats
Baby: Well she is definitely growing. Last night was the first time I felt something pressed up against my ribs. According to the books, she is putting on an ounce a day
Mama Size: Up 30 pounds and according to the books, I should stop gaining weight now. The books suck.
Symptoms: I had a weird one-day episode of feet swelling and I have no idea why. It made me grateful to be heavily pregnant in the spring where the weather is simply beautiful and the heat is not unbearable. Peter thinks I'm nesting like crazy and maybe I am; I do have a ton of energy and motivation to be productive at both work and home.
Other updates: I go in for my 37 week check today but I don't expect any changes from last week. I don't think the baby has started to engage at all.
Last night, my neighborhood threw me a baby shower and it was like the combination of five Christmases and 10 birthdays. I'm not kidding when I say we carried laundry baskets full of gifts into my house. As fun as it was to receive tons of cute outfits (oh the sun dresses! And the tiny socks! And rainbow....RAINBOW LEGGINGS) it was so much nicer to feel loved and supported by the community. The woman in charge of the local church's children's program told me that in the summer, there are usually weekly play dates at the nearby playground and even though her social skills won't be quite up to par by then, I will definitely take as much interaction as I can get.
I forgot to write up my doula story last week so here it is. First, I view a doula as someone who can support myself and Peter during the birth since neither one of us really knows what to expect. That being said, I have strong opinions about not having strong opinions :) What I mean is that I would rather approach labor and delivery with an open mind, an understanding that I will need to be flexible, and a "let's see how I feel at that time" mantra. I have met with my doula twice now and both times have felt uneasy that she is so pro-natural that instead of arguing with my doctors, I will be arguing with her. Sigh. Both times she has looked at me very seriously and asked, "How much do you want this?" (This=going all natural). I was caught off guard the first time she asked me and responded, "Well I definitely would prefer if I could birth that way, but I would be fine if it didn't happen." The second time, just last week, I said, "I would view it as a successful birth if everyone was alive at the end." She said, "Well you know, unless you really want it and have it as your goal, then you could waver during transition and that's when it's almost over." Yes, I know that usually, when the thought of 'I can't do this anymore' comes to mind, that means you're about ready to push. But good grief, if I've been in active labor for more than 13 hours with no end in sight, there is no way she or anyone else will get in my way for rest and pain easement. Then she said something that really bothered me. "A lot of times, if the mom is asking for drugs, I'll ask her to wait another hour, just to see." I told her very clearly, "I don't want you or anyone else to do that." Well I actually meant, except for Peter but he knows that all decision making rests between us.
I talked it over with Peter afterwards and I realized that what bothers me about both the medical establishment and my doula's remarks is this assumption that during birth, they know more about my physical and mental state than I do. I just work better with someone rationally laying out the pros and cons and letting me (and Peter) make the decision instead of pressuring us with emotional tactics. My doctor is very much that way but I'm worried my doula is not.
It is unfortunately too late to hire someone else. When I called her up the first time, I was under the impression that our first meeting was the equivalent of a job interview. Apparently, the first phone call was the interview and setting up the first meeting meant that we were then obligated to pay all the fees. That bothered me at the time and I expressed my surprise, but I felt like I had already agreed to the deal since she told me she had told me on the phone (which she did but it didn't register what she meant).
Ultimately, we can always kick her out of the room but I really think it will be fine in the end. She teaches hypnobirthing so it will be nice to have someone there to remind me to relax, to read some scripts, and whatnot.
Question of the Week: What has been your experience with emotional pressure from medical or lay professionals?
Mama Size: Up 30 pounds and according to the books, I should stop gaining weight now. The books suck.
Symptoms: I had a weird one-day episode of feet swelling and I have no idea why. It made me grateful to be heavily pregnant in the spring where the weather is simply beautiful and the heat is not unbearable. Peter thinks I'm nesting like crazy and maybe I am; I do have a ton of energy and motivation to be productive at both work and home.
Other updates: I go in for my 37 week check today but I don't expect any changes from last week. I don't think the baby has started to engage at all.
Last night, my neighborhood threw me a baby shower and it was like the combination of five Christmases and 10 birthdays. I'm not kidding when I say we carried laundry baskets full of gifts into my house. As fun as it was to receive tons of cute outfits (oh the sun dresses! And the tiny socks! And rainbow....RAINBOW LEGGINGS) it was so much nicer to feel loved and supported by the community. The woman in charge of the local church's children's program told me that in the summer, there are usually weekly play dates at the nearby playground and even though her social skills won't be quite up to par by then, I will definitely take as much interaction as I can get.
I forgot to write up my doula story last week so here it is. First, I view a doula as someone who can support myself and Peter during the birth since neither one of us really knows what to expect. That being said, I have strong opinions about not having strong opinions :) What I mean is that I would rather approach labor and delivery with an open mind, an understanding that I will need to be flexible, and a "let's see how I feel at that time" mantra. I have met with my doula twice now and both times have felt uneasy that she is so pro-natural that instead of arguing with my doctors, I will be arguing with her. Sigh. Both times she has looked at me very seriously and asked, "How much do you want this?" (This=going all natural). I was caught off guard the first time she asked me and responded, "Well I definitely would prefer if I could birth that way, but I would be fine if it didn't happen." The second time, just last week, I said, "I would view it as a successful birth if everyone was alive at the end." She said, "Well you know, unless you really want it and have it as your goal, then you could waver during transition and that's when it's almost over." Yes, I know that usually, when the thought of 'I can't do this anymore' comes to mind, that means you're about ready to push. But good grief, if I've been in active labor for more than 13 hours with no end in sight, there is no way she or anyone else will get in my way for rest and pain easement. Then she said something that really bothered me. "A lot of times, if the mom is asking for drugs, I'll ask her to wait another hour, just to see." I told her very clearly, "I don't want you or anyone else to do that." Well I actually meant, except for Peter but he knows that all decision making rests between us.
I talked it over with Peter afterwards and I realized that what bothers me about both the medical establishment and my doula's remarks is this assumption that during birth, they know more about my physical and mental state than I do. I just work better with someone rationally laying out the pros and cons and letting me (and Peter) make the decision instead of pressuring us with emotional tactics. My doctor is very much that way but I'm worried my doula is not.
It is unfortunately too late to hire someone else. When I called her up the first time, I was under the impression that our first meeting was the equivalent of a job interview. Apparently, the first phone call was the interview and setting up the first meeting meant that we were then obligated to pay all the fees. That bothered me at the time and I expressed my surprise, but I felt like I had already agreed to the deal since she told me she had told me on the phone (which she did but it didn't register what she meant).
Ultimately, we can always kick her out of the room but I really think it will be fine in the end. She teaches hypnobirthing so it will be nice to have someone there to remind me to relax, to read some scripts, and whatnot.
Question of the Week: What has been your experience with emotional pressure from medical or lay professionals?
37 Weeks
Dear Baby,
You are now full-term! Totally freeloading after this. I am really enjoying this part of the pregnancy though, so feel free to stay in a few more weeks.
I was thinking about how excited we are to meet you and get to know you and I realized we already know so much about you. You love it when your dad and I talk while laying with our stomachs facing each other because you begin to kick up a storm. You'll move when some songs come on the radio (like Michael Buble? Riddle me that one) but are usually rather indifferent to the radio. I have eaten spicy and really flavorful foods and don't notice a response until I eat something sugary. Your dad thinks he can feel your feet some times and likes to play a game where he attempts to grab one. You always respond to that indignity by withdrawing whatever appendage it really is.
These are all things that no one but a first time mother would document but I really do cherish this time of your life.
Love,
Mama
You are now full-term! Totally freeloading after this. I am really enjoying this part of the pregnancy though, so feel free to stay in a few more weeks.
I was thinking about how excited we are to meet you and get to know you and I realized we already know so much about you. You love it when your dad and I talk while laying with our stomachs facing each other because you begin to kick up a storm. You'll move when some songs come on the radio (like Michael Buble? Riddle me that one) but are usually rather indifferent to the radio. I have eaten spicy and really flavorful foods and don't notice a response until I eat something sugary. Your dad thinks he can feel your feet some times and likes to play a game where he attempts to grab one. You always respond to that indignity by withdrawing whatever appendage it really is.
These are all things that no one but a first time mother would document but I really do cherish this time of your life.
Love,
Mama
Friday, March 9, 2012
36 Week Stats
Baby Size: Apparently gaining an ounce a day. That's quite the feat!
Mama Size: 39 inches around and up 29 pounds. Found stretch marks on the underside of my belly, tried to decide how I felt about them, and went back to eating the rest of our girl scout cookies. Those cursed thin mints and tagalongs are making me mentally adjust how much weight I'm comfortable gaining.
Symptoms: So I've been whining dramatically this whole pregnancy about my poor pelvis and how it has hurt so flipping much and how I would just like to have my child without all these physical pains thanks-very-much. Well it turns out it has been my tailbone this whole time. I don't know what gave my coccyx the idea that it would be fun to pretend to be broken for nine months, but I've been sitting on a makeshift donut pillow (ok, a boppy) ever since I figured it out and ahhhhhhhhh. Blissful painless legs and hips. I am going to a chiropractor next week to get my pelvis checked out before labor and I'll ask them to see if those bones got misaligned somehow. I still get some aches and pains at the end of the day but they all fall under what I'd expect to happen after gaining 30 pounds in my stomach. And fine, butt. Arms. Chest.
Other Updates: Oh the updates. Where to start. I went in for my 36 week appointment and am not dilated but my cervix is starting to soften (40%). The nurse did the GBS test and sent me on my way. It was exciting if uneventful. I know that women can walk around dilated and effaced for weeks or be nothing at all right before labor but the numbers satisfy the data nerd inside me.
Ok onto the rant of the week. I have never been a parent before. I have spent years in school learning about parenting-related topics and then I spent years teaching said topics to other college students. I freely admit my knowledge is academic instead of anecdotal and I keep my mouth shut when talking to mothers. So. This week we took a one-night class from the hospital on breastfeeding. When I used to teach my classes about breastfeeding, I always firmly expressed that we are so lucky to have options and although breast is best in a lot of ways, formula will not make one a bad parent. So that was the first thing that really rankled me about the instructor--she was very dismissive and contemptuous about formula. She then talked about the health benefits of breastmilk and I was with her until she started talking about the intellectual benefits of breastfeeding. The problem is that all the research on IQ differences in breastfed vs. formula-fed children is flawed in serious ways. The biggest flaw is that measuring IQ in infants is based on a lot of assumptions that don't exist for other areas of development. For example, we don't expect children to all be walking at the same time; why should we expect children to develop intellectually on a similar time frame? Also, how exactly do you measure infant IQ? The tests that exist are only weakly, if at all, correlated with adult intelligence. The second biggest flaw is the studies that do show an IQ advantage for breastfed children have a small sample and do not provide enough longitudinal data. The ones that are large and long-term have found that by age 8, there are no intellectual differences between the two types of children.
So I broke my rule of silence. I was mortified because I hate being confrontational but the thought of all these couples feeling as if they would have "dumber" children if they had to formula feed for whatever reason made me feel sick. I tried as politely as possible to explain the research and she even agreed that formula milk now has the same LCPUFA (the chemicals that we know are linked to neurological development) that breast milk has. But she was adamant that breastfed children are smarter.
Peter afterwards whispered to me that he was proud of me but I felt bad and it left me wondering if I was wrong. The only other solution would have been talking to her afterwards, but then the rest of the class would never have heard the other side. I tried to be very friendly and smiling and nodding the rest of the class but I could tell she was unhappy. Oh well, right?
Question of the week: What is it about some parenting methods that turn people into fanatics? I have a doula story that I'll have to save for another post but is it just me, or is the natural movement turning into just another excuse for giving parents unwelcome advice? :)
Mama Size: 39 inches around and up 29 pounds. Found stretch marks on the underside of my belly, tried to decide how I felt about them, and went back to eating the rest of our girl scout cookies. Those cursed thin mints and tagalongs are making me mentally adjust how much weight I'm comfortable gaining.
Symptoms: So I've been whining dramatically this whole pregnancy about my poor pelvis and how it has hurt so flipping much and how I would just like to have my child without all these physical pains thanks-very-much. Well it turns out it has been my tailbone this whole time. I don't know what gave my coccyx the idea that it would be fun to pretend to be broken for nine months, but I've been sitting on a makeshift donut pillow (ok, a boppy) ever since I figured it out and ahhhhhhhhh. Blissful painless legs and hips. I am going to a chiropractor next week to get my pelvis checked out before labor and I'll ask them to see if those bones got misaligned somehow. I still get some aches and pains at the end of the day but they all fall under what I'd expect to happen after gaining 30 pounds in my stomach. And fine, butt. Arms. Chest.
Other Updates: Oh the updates. Where to start. I went in for my 36 week appointment and am not dilated but my cervix is starting to soften (40%). The nurse did the GBS test and sent me on my way. It was exciting if uneventful. I know that women can walk around dilated and effaced for weeks or be nothing at all right before labor but the numbers satisfy the data nerd inside me.
Ok onto the rant of the week. I have never been a parent before. I have spent years in school learning about parenting-related topics and then I spent years teaching said topics to other college students. I freely admit my knowledge is academic instead of anecdotal and I keep my mouth shut when talking to mothers. So. This week we took a one-night class from the hospital on breastfeeding. When I used to teach my classes about breastfeeding, I always firmly expressed that we are so lucky to have options and although breast is best in a lot of ways, formula will not make one a bad parent. So that was the first thing that really rankled me about the instructor--she was very dismissive and contemptuous about formula. She then talked about the health benefits of breastmilk and I was with her until she started talking about the intellectual benefits of breastfeeding. The problem is that all the research on IQ differences in breastfed vs. formula-fed children is flawed in serious ways. The biggest flaw is that measuring IQ in infants is based on a lot of assumptions that don't exist for other areas of development. For example, we don't expect children to all be walking at the same time; why should we expect children to develop intellectually on a similar time frame? Also, how exactly do you measure infant IQ? The tests that exist are only weakly, if at all, correlated with adult intelligence. The second biggest flaw is the studies that do show an IQ advantage for breastfed children have a small sample and do not provide enough longitudinal data. The ones that are large and long-term have found that by age 8, there are no intellectual differences between the two types of children.
So I broke my rule of silence. I was mortified because I hate being confrontational but the thought of all these couples feeling as if they would have "dumber" children if they had to formula feed for whatever reason made me feel sick. I tried as politely as possible to explain the research and she even agreed that formula milk now has the same LCPUFA (the chemicals that we know are linked to neurological development) that breast milk has. But she was adamant that breastfed children are smarter.
Peter afterwards whispered to me that he was proud of me but I felt bad and it left me wondering if I was wrong. The only other solution would have been talking to her afterwards, but then the rest of the class would never have heard the other side. I tried to be very friendly and smiling and nodding the rest of the class but I could tell she was unhappy. Oh well, right?
Question of the week: What is it about some parenting methods that turn people into fanatics? I have a doula story that I'll have to save for another post but is it just me, or is the natural movement turning into just another excuse for giving parents unwelcome advice? :)
36 Weeks
Dear Baby,
I had a dream last night that I gave birth to you and you came out, wrapped in your placenta like you were in a sleeping bag. Although my subconscious is apparently worried about all the wrong things, thoughts about labor are starting to nudge their way to the front of my mind and I read birth stories with a new perspective. Instead of enjoying them like the ultimate short stories they are (build-up, crescendo, and then happily ever after), I find myself wondering how similar our birth story will be by comparison.
I deeply hope that however it plays out, it will be calm and as trauma-free as I can help it for both of us.
Love,
Mama
I had a dream last night that I gave birth to you and you came out, wrapped in your placenta like you were in a sleeping bag. Although my subconscious is apparently worried about all the wrong things, thoughts about labor are starting to nudge their way to the front of my mind and I read birth stories with a new perspective. Instead of enjoying them like the ultimate short stories they are (build-up, crescendo, and then happily ever after), I find myself wondering how similar our birth story will be by comparison.
I deeply hope that however it plays out, it will be calm and as trauma-free as I can help it for both of us.
Love,
Mama
Monday, March 5, 2012
And one more for posterity
Peter will kill me but I think the baby's blog needs one silly picture of daddy
32 vs 35 weeks
I keep forgetting to update my bump shots
Here is my 32 week picture
And my 35 week one
It is honestly perplexing how my belly changed that rapidly. I mean, not that perplexing (duh there's a baby growing) but according to my measurements, I actually lost half an inch in my waist over those weeks. Maybe it's b/c she flipped from transverse to head down in that time period?
Here is my 32 week picture
And my 35 week one
It is honestly perplexing how my belly changed that rapidly. I mean, not that perplexing (duh there's a baby growing) but according to my measurements, I actually lost half an inch in my waist over those weeks. Maybe it's b/c she flipped from transverse to head down in that time period?
Thursday, March 1, 2012
35 Week Stats
Baby Size: 5 pounds ish?
Mama Size: Up 27 pounds and 38 inch waist. I didn't feel like I grew much this week.
Symptoms: She hiccups every night :) It's really cute. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now which makes my endurance of all the aches and pains easier. It's shocking how physically tiring it is to work in an office job all day--that has definitely been unexpected. I am lucky in that I can go home and work as long as I don't have a meeting but I am so much more productive being at work that I try to stay as long as possible. People keep asking me when my last day is and is it a sign of workaholism if I hope to work until I go into labor?
Other updates: I ran this week! Ok, not full out or even....jogging speed. I guess I shuffled. I was on a walk and was feeling so good I thought I'd see how it felt to go faster. So I started picking up the pace and I'm sure I looked RIDICULOUS. I only "ran" for maybe a quarter mile but it felt great, if a little weird. It just felt weird to go through the motions of running with all this weight around my middle. Unfortunately, that was Monday and the rest of the week had really bad weather so I haven't been out since. I can't wait until I can start to really exercise again.
We put up a bookshelf and rug in the nursery and now all that's left are the accessories--a light, a few shelves, some paintings, and the mobile. I hope to have pictures up in a few weeks.
Also I had sushi this week and it was mind blowing. Oh just thinking about it makes me crave it again. I really wanted to expose this little baby to all the flavors of the world that I enjoy and so far, she has had quite the range of cuisines--Korean, Vietnamese, Thai, Mexican, Cajun, Indian, etc., but the one I found most enjoyable has been Japanese sushi. I find the grocery store kind slightly revolting or I could go and have some right.this.second. Sigh.
Next week is full of baby stuff! Doula visit, doctor visit, and breastfeeding class. This means my 36 week entry will be even longer than usual :)
Question of the Week: I know eating sushi is frowned upon in America (rolling eyes--it's incredibly safe if eaten at a clean establishment and if you avoid the predator fish. But that is good advice for any time of your life, not just during pregnancy). So what "rules" did you break during pregnancy? I have a whole list of other things but I'm afraid they will really cause an outcry. Unless what you did was worse :)
Mama Size: Up 27 pounds and 38 inch waist. I didn't feel like I grew much this week.
Symptoms: She hiccups every night :) It's really cute. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now which makes my endurance of all the aches and pains easier. It's shocking how physically tiring it is to work in an office job all day--that has definitely been unexpected. I am lucky in that I can go home and work as long as I don't have a meeting but I am so much more productive being at work that I try to stay as long as possible. People keep asking me when my last day is and is it a sign of workaholism if I hope to work until I go into labor?
Other updates: I ran this week! Ok, not full out or even....jogging speed. I guess I shuffled. I was on a walk and was feeling so good I thought I'd see how it felt to go faster. So I started picking up the pace and I'm sure I looked RIDICULOUS. I only "ran" for maybe a quarter mile but it felt great, if a little weird. It just felt weird to go through the motions of running with all this weight around my middle. Unfortunately, that was Monday and the rest of the week had really bad weather so I haven't been out since. I can't wait until I can start to really exercise again.
We put up a bookshelf and rug in the nursery and now all that's left are the accessories--a light, a few shelves, some paintings, and the mobile. I hope to have pictures up in a few weeks.
Also I had sushi this week and it was mind blowing. Oh just thinking about it makes me crave it again. I really wanted to expose this little baby to all the flavors of the world that I enjoy and so far, she has had quite the range of cuisines--Korean, Vietnamese, Thai, Mexican, Cajun, Indian, etc., but the one I found most enjoyable has been Japanese sushi. I find the grocery store kind slightly revolting or I could go and have some right.this.second. Sigh.
Next week is full of baby stuff! Doula visit, doctor visit, and breastfeeding class. This means my 36 week entry will be even longer than usual :)
Question of the Week: I know eating sushi is frowned upon in America (rolling eyes--it's incredibly safe if eaten at a clean establishment and if you avoid the predator fish. But that is good advice for any time of your life, not just during pregnancy). So what "rules" did you break during pregnancy? I have a whole list of other things but I'm afraid they will really cause an outcry. Unless what you did was worse :)
35 Weeks
Dear Baby,
My dear friend from college just had her baby today and of course, it made me think about you. I wonder if you will love her daughter as much as I love the mother. She and I laughed that the only thing better would have been if one of us had had a boy so that we could plan a wedding in 20+ years.
Of course, I hope you have a fulfilling career and travel the world and get as much education as you want. However, having experienced those things, being with your father has trumped them all. I can't wait for you to grow up knowing him.
Love,
Mama
My dear friend from college just had her baby today and of course, it made me think about you. I wonder if you will love her daughter as much as I love the mother. She and I laughed that the only thing better would have been if one of us had had a boy so that we could plan a wedding in 20+ years.
Of course, I hope you have a fulfilling career and travel the world and get as much education as you want. However, having experienced those things, being with your father has trumped them all. I can't wait for you to grow up knowing him.
Love,
Mama
Thursday, February 23, 2012
34 Week Stats
Baby Size: 4 pounds at least
Mama Size: Up 27 pounds. Waist still the same. According to my doctor, my fundal height has always been spot on but I know it's kind of a bogus measurement.
Symptoms: Braxton Hicks every night and possibly throughout the day--I usually can't ascertain between her stretching out and BH, but every once in a while my stomach gets unmistakably hard (like, my belly button pokes out). Oh and I peed my pants when I sneezed this week. My doctor told me that past 37 weeks, if I feel like my water has broken I can come in and get swabbed. In her words, "At that point of time, there's just stuff coming out all the time" and I nodded sagely. Peter would be so horrified at some of these discussions.
Other updates: Had my 34 week checkup and yay, she turned head down. Although she still hasn't dropped but maybe by my 36 checkup. I asked about my doctor's policy on inductions and I just meant after 41 weeks, but she told me that she'd be ok starting sweeps at 38 weeks and if I wanted, pitocin after 40. I don't want the pit but I was relieved to know that she was ok jump starting labor and that I wouldn't be pregnant until mid-April. I start to get cervical checks at 36 weeks and will start the weekly doctor visits at that time.
I'm excited and so ready to be done with gestating but this means we really need to finish the nursery, wash a few clothes, and maybe prep a few freezer meals. I've read that foods that can be eaten with one hand are even better so I'm not sure I'll make any dinners ahead of time. Sandwiches, fruit, veggies, hummus are things I eat anyways and most of the time sound so much more appealing than even lasagna or chili. And Peter is very adept at making dinner for himself, even if those dinners mostly involve meat and carbs.
Question of the week: So what did you do (or want to do) for meals after delivery? Is it really helpful to have meals prepped ahead of time?
Mama Size: Up 27 pounds. Waist still the same. According to my doctor, my fundal height has always been spot on but I know it's kind of a bogus measurement.
Symptoms: Braxton Hicks every night and possibly throughout the day--I usually can't ascertain between her stretching out and BH, but every once in a while my stomach gets unmistakably hard (like, my belly button pokes out). Oh and I peed my pants when I sneezed this week. My doctor told me that past 37 weeks, if I feel like my water has broken I can come in and get swabbed. In her words, "At that point of time, there's just stuff coming out all the time" and I nodded sagely. Peter would be so horrified at some of these discussions.
Other updates: Had my 34 week checkup and yay, she turned head down. Although she still hasn't dropped but maybe by my 36 checkup. I asked about my doctor's policy on inductions and I just meant after 41 weeks, but she told me that she'd be ok starting sweeps at 38 weeks and if I wanted, pitocin after 40. I don't want the pit but I was relieved to know that she was ok jump starting labor and that I wouldn't be pregnant until mid-April. I start to get cervical checks at 36 weeks and will start the weekly doctor visits at that time.
I'm excited and so ready to be done with gestating but this means we really need to finish the nursery, wash a few clothes, and maybe prep a few freezer meals. I've read that foods that can be eaten with one hand are even better so I'm not sure I'll make any dinners ahead of time. Sandwiches, fruit, veggies, hummus are things I eat anyways and most of the time sound so much more appealing than even lasagna or chili. And Peter is very adept at making dinner for himself, even if those dinners mostly involve meat and carbs.
Question of the week: So what did you do (or want to do) for meals after delivery? Is it really helpful to have meals prepped ahead of time?
34 Weeks
Dear Baby,
According to the doctor you have definitely turned head down so I guess your father's encouragement actually worked. Last night I was trying to determine exactly how you were laying and realized that the large bump near my belly button was your rump! I don't know why we thought it was your head. Then I felt further down and could feel a tiny hard head and you suddenly felt so real. I have a human inside me and it is simultaneously miraculous and surreal.
I had to take another glucose test this morning and other than a few squirms and two kicks, you didn't react at all--foreshadowing of your temperament? Or maybe things are just so cramped inside that you couldn't do more than feebly protest.
My doctor promised me that I wouldn't have to go past 41 weeks so we will definitely be seeing you before tax day. Hooray hooray.
Lots of love,
Mama
According to the doctor you have definitely turned head down so I guess your father's encouragement actually worked. Last night I was trying to determine exactly how you were laying and realized that the large bump near my belly button was your rump! I don't know why we thought it was your head. Then I felt further down and could feel a tiny hard head and you suddenly felt so real. I have a human inside me and it is simultaneously miraculous and surreal.
I had to take another glucose test this morning and other than a few squirms and two kicks, you didn't react at all--foreshadowing of your temperament? Or maybe things are just so cramped inside that you couldn't do more than feebly protest.
My doctor promised me that I wouldn't have to go past 41 weeks so we will definitely be seeing you before tax day. Hooray hooray.
Lots of love,
Mama
Thursday, February 16, 2012
33 Week Stats
Baby size: large
Mama size: Up 26 pounds and 38.5 inch waist. Fondly remembering when my chest felt small. Never thought I'd say that
Symptoms: Weird foot pain in my left foot but I went on a walk today and I just ignored it. Having a hard time rolling over in bed; my weekly babycenter newsletter suggested wearing silk pjs and having silk sheets. Hahaha it made me laugh at how ludicrous that sounded.
Other updates: I ordered a bunch of things from amazon, including some cute grovia diaper covers, the tiniest rectal thermometer I've ever seen, a nose frida, and a changing pad. I took one look at the pad and thought, that might solve my newborn sleeping question! It's firm and waterproof and padded and has a strap. :) I just have to get some baby medicine and stool softeners (thx for the tips!) and a few more little things and I think we'll be good to go.
Question of the week: When did you pack your hospital bag? Is it too late if I do it at the beginning stages of labor?
Mama size: Up 26 pounds and 38.5 inch waist. Fondly remembering when my chest felt small. Never thought I'd say that
Symptoms: Weird foot pain in my left foot but I went on a walk today and I just ignored it. Having a hard time rolling over in bed; my weekly babycenter newsletter suggested wearing silk pjs and having silk sheets. Hahaha it made me laugh at how ludicrous that sounded.
Other updates: I ordered a bunch of things from amazon, including some cute grovia diaper covers, the tiniest rectal thermometer I've ever seen, a nose frida, and a changing pad. I took one look at the pad and thought, that might solve my newborn sleeping question! It's firm and waterproof and padded and has a strap. :) I just have to get some baby medicine and stool softeners (thx for the tips!) and a few more little things and I think we'll be good to go.
Question of the week: When did you pack your hospital bag? Is it too late if I do it at the beginning stages of labor?
33 Weeks
Dear Baby,
Mother Nature has definitely made it so that I would rather go through labor and delivery than remain pregnant. This does not bode well for your future sibling. I almost wrote siblings but right now it would be safer for everyone if we pretended there was only going to be one more. I know that in another year or two I will have forgotten all the wonderful tricks my body is pulling but maybe this post will serve as my shoulder cricket.
When you are 100 days old, we are throwing you a traditional Korean celebration called baek-il. We are Americans so of course the resulting party will look nothing like the ones my ancestors threw, but it's the spirit that counts. Your dad and I are planning on making a video for you, expressing our love, our blessings, and our hopes for you. This is the first week I've hoped for you to be tall with a long torso and birthing hips. Pretty much everything you are not genetically inclined to be. :)
I have a feeling these letters are going to get weirder and whinier.
Love,
Mama
Mother Nature has definitely made it so that I would rather go through labor and delivery than remain pregnant. This does not bode well for your future sibling. I almost wrote siblings but right now it would be safer for everyone if we pretended there was only going to be one more. I know that in another year or two I will have forgotten all the wonderful tricks my body is pulling but maybe this post will serve as my shoulder cricket.
When you are 100 days old, we are throwing you a traditional Korean celebration called baek-il. We are Americans so of course the resulting party will look nothing like the ones my ancestors threw, but it's the spirit that counts. Your dad and I are planning on making a video for you, expressing our love, our blessings, and our hopes for you. This is the first week I've hoped for you to be tall with a long torso and birthing hips. Pretty much everything you are not genetically inclined to be. :)
I have a feeling these letters are going to get weirder and whinier.
Love,
Mama
Thursday, February 9, 2012
32 Week Stats
Baby Size: Getting closer to 4 pounds
Mama Size: Definite growth spurt this week--up 24 pounds and a 38.5 inch waist. My doctor wants me to gain 35 total and while I balked at first, I am definitely well on my way there.
Symptoms: I think the baby turned head down but that only has intensified my peeing frequency. I am actually enjoying this part of pregnancy even with the aches and fatigue. My pelvis pain has left almost entirely (knock on wood) and Peter and I went on a 45 minute long walk this week. I almost cried with happiness because I could do it! I could walk and wasn't out of breath or in excruciating pain and had plenty of endurance. It felt so normal.
Other updates: I had my first baby shower this week, thrown by my coworkers and actually loved it. Mostly because it was a co-shower with another coworker and it never felt as if the spotlight was on me too long. I know I'm such an attention freak. Anyways it was very sweet and this baby will never run out of things to wear.
We finished our birthing class HOORAY! We practiced our breathing techniques and birth positions and a few scripts--visualizations that Peter will read to me between contractions.We have one more class at the hospital--a breast feeding one--in early March and then we won't go back until it's showtime.
Question of the week: What were some things that people usually don't gift you but that you needed for the baby? I'm thinking things like baby clippers, infant tylenol?, thermometers? So far we have tons of socks, infant mittens, sleepers, pjs, onesies, dresses, blankets, hats, and even shoes. Yes shoes. I am proud to say that besides white sleepers and two dresses, I have not bought her any of that. Anyways, we also have a crib, mattress, sheets, stroller, car seat, infant car seat insert, rocking chair, thousands of wipes, cloth diapers, baby shampoo......I know I need to also get a changing pad and bathtub and possibly a swing but I am really trying to hold off on buying anything non-necessary until after she gets here. I might break down and buy a sling so that Peter can watch her while playing on his computer :) Oh and I'm completely avoiding the whole feeding aspect of having a baby. I have a feeling that we'll be formula feeding her almost right from the get-go but if I buy bottles and formula now, it's like admitting defeat prematurely. Although ironically I'm also resistant to buying a boppy or a nursing pillow. It's like I'm blocking the fact that I'll have to feed her entirely.
Also what things do they give you in the hospital for the baby--pacifiers, aspirators? I keep almost buying them but there's no point if we get them already.
Mama Size: Definite growth spurt this week--up 24 pounds and a 38.5 inch waist. My doctor wants me to gain 35 total and while I balked at first, I am definitely well on my way there.
Symptoms: I think the baby turned head down but that only has intensified my peeing frequency. I am actually enjoying this part of pregnancy even with the aches and fatigue. My pelvis pain has left almost entirely (knock on wood) and Peter and I went on a 45 minute long walk this week. I almost cried with happiness because I could do it! I could walk and wasn't out of breath or in excruciating pain and had plenty of endurance. It felt so normal.
Other updates: I had my first baby shower this week, thrown by my coworkers and actually loved it. Mostly because it was a co-shower with another coworker and it never felt as if the spotlight was on me too long. I know I'm such an attention freak. Anyways it was very sweet and this baby will never run out of things to wear.
We finished our birthing class HOORAY! We practiced our breathing techniques and birth positions and a few scripts--visualizations that Peter will read to me between contractions.We have one more class at the hospital--a breast feeding one--in early March and then we won't go back until it's showtime.
Question of the week: What were some things that people usually don't gift you but that you needed for the baby? I'm thinking things like baby clippers, infant tylenol?, thermometers? So far we have tons of socks, infant mittens, sleepers, pjs, onesies, dresses, blankets, hats, and even shoes. Yes shoes. I am proud to say that besides white sleepers and two dresses, I have not bought her any of that. Anyways, we also have a crib, mattress, sheets, stroller, car seat, infant car seat insert, rocking chair, thousands of wipes, cloth diapers, baby shampoo......I know I need to also get a changing pad and bathtub and possibly a swing but I am really trying to hold off on buying anything non-necessary until after she gets here. I might break down and buy a sling so that Peter can watch her while playing on his computer :) Oh and I'm completely avoiding the whole feeding aspect of having a baby. I have a feeling that we'll be formula feeding her almost right from the get-go but if I buy bottles and formula now, it's like admitting defeat prematurely. Although ironically I'm also resistant to buying a boppy or a nursing pillow. It's like I'm blocking the fact that I'll have to feed her entirely.
Also what things do they give you in the hospital for the baby--pacifiers, aspirators? I keep almost buying them but there's no point if we get them already.
32 Weeks
Dear Baby,
This has been one of the mildest Utah winters I've ever experienced and I have to admit that I'm loving it. My big fears of slipping on some ice and falling or getting in a car accident due to bad weather have not materialized.
At my doctor's appointment last week, the doctor told me you were still lying transverse, like you were in a hammock. I went home and googled what that meant in terms of labor and delivery and found that you must turn before labor starts or else you would have to be born by c-section. I am not concerned because you do have 8 weeks to flip head down but I still thought it would be a good idea to encourage you to start turning. I think your dad sometimes can't believe the words that come out of my mouth and he gets this look on his face like he thinks I'm trolling him. I told him to get you to turn we needed him to talk or sing down by my pelvis so that you hear him and shift appropriately. He complied but made sure I knew how weird he thought it all was.
And I think it's working because after a night in which you wriggled more than usual, I woke up the next morning feeling distinct movements at the top and bottom of my belly instead of the left and right sides. I can't tell if you're now breech or head-down but I think you must be head down because I occasionally feel this uncomfortable pressure on my cervix.
Which means we're that much closer to an actual delivery! Only 8 more weeks if I'm lucky.
Love,
Mama
This has been one of the mildest Utah winters I've ever experienced and I have to admit that I'm loving it. My big fears of slipping on some ice and falling or getting in a car accident due to bad weather have not materialized.
At my doctor's appointment last week, the doctor told me you were still lying transverse, like you were in a hammock. I went home and googled what that meant in terms of labor and delivery and found that you must turn before labor starts or else you would have to be born by c-section. I am not concerned because you do have 8 weeks to flip head down but I still thought it would be a good idea to encourage you to start turning. I think your dad sometimes can't believe the words that come out of my mouth and he gets this look on his face like he thinks I'm trolling him. I told him to get you to turn we needed him to talk or sing down by my pelvis so that you hear him and shift appropriately. He complied but made sure I knew how weird he thought it all was.
And I think it's working because after a night in which you wriggled more than usual, I woke up the next morning feeling distinct movements at the top and bottom of my belly instead of the left and right sides. I can't tell if you're now breech or head-down but I think you must be head down because I occasionally feel this uncomfortable pressure on my cervix.
Which means we're that much closer to an actual delivery! Only 8 more weeks if I'm lucky.
Love,
Mama
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
To interrupt the regular scheduled program.....
Well you all have thoroughly shamed me for being so flippant about my hospital! When my birthing instructor who is a head nurse at IMC acted like pro-natural policies were so normal I really did assume that most other places were like that or getting like that. And I'm sad to hear that isn't the case.
She did say that when we checked in to make sure to specify that we want a pro-natural nurse so maybe there are still some staff there who like to do things old-school.
Anyways, here's hoping that the tide is changing. Also, to go hand-in-hand with my parental leave complaints last week, here is something that really is surprising: Parenting Leave Our parental policies here don't make me angry, exactly, but it is shocking when even third world countries have better leave practices than we do.
She did say that when we checked in to make sure to specify that we want a pro-natural nurse so maybe there are still some staff there who like to do things old-school.
Anyways, here's hoping that the tide is changing. Also, to go hand-in-hand with my parental leave complaints last week, here is something that really is surprising: Parenting Leave Our parental policies here don't make me angry, exactly, but it is shocking when even third world countries have better leave practices than we do.
Saturday, February 4, 2012
31 Week Stats
Baby Size: Still estimated around 3.5 pounds
Mama Size: For some reason am losing weight and inches. Up 22 pounds and a 37 inch waist. My doctor didn't seem concerned and I definitely feel the baby kicking every few hours.
Symptoms: Oh the fatigue. I actually came home early on Wednesday and promptly fell asleep. I am so grateful that I am still experiencing some great nights of sleep and am not taking that for granted. If my sleep quality starts to drop significantly near the end, I might start my leave a little early. I am pretty useless for higher level cognitive tasks once I get pregnancy-sleepy. Ha, at the risk of sounding like an annoying 'you-don't-know-what-this-feels-like' pregnant woman--pregnant sleepy is so different than regular sleepy! The latter I can power through while the former makes me a dangerous driver.
Other updates: We missed our childbirth class this week due to Peter being in San Francisco and my hell no reaction to when Peter asked me if I was going to sit through it without him. Plus that night's agenda was focused solely on birth plans and my birth plan is woefully underwhelming. Well that coupled with a doctor and a hospital that, according to the business of being born, is shockingly pro-natural, pro-doula, pro-parent choices and would make Ina Garten proud. My hospital insists on an hour of skin to skin contact, immediate latching, delay of any and all newborn tasks (including weight and eyedrops) until parents feel bonded. My ob won't cut the cord until it stops pulsing, encourages breastfeeding (mind over matter was her phrasing), and is willing to wait on inductions until around 42 weeks. I have in my drafted birth plan to keep the baby in the nursery as the default instead of in my room and I have to laugh at the irony that I will be going against the "norm" now. I almost think that any specifications on my part would be met with a "Silly girl, we do that for all our patients now". We went on our hospital tour today and was told that mothers are encouraged to walk around, labor on the birthing ball, or labor in the jacuzzi. Such a stark difference when you look back ten or twenty years.
The tour actually got me excited to go into labor if only for the view. Being in a high rise hospital room with huge windows that face the wasatch front makes me feel luckier than Beyonce.
Question of the week: When did you put your car seats in your cars? We're planning on visiting the local fire station to make sure we install the bases correctly. Waiting until 38 weeks or so seems reasonable to me but is that too early?
Mama Size: For some reason am losing weight and inches. Up 22 pounds and a 37 inch waist. My doctor didn't seem concerned and I definitely feel the baby kicking every few hours.
Symptoms: Oh the fatigue. I actually came home early on Wednesday and promptly fell asleep. I am so grateful that I am still experiencing some great nights of sleep and am not taking that for granted. If my sleep quality starts to drop significantly near the end, I might start my leave a little early. I am pretty useless for higher level cognitive tasks once I get pregnancy-sleepy. Ha, at the risk of sounding like an annoying 'you-don't-know-what-this-feels-like' pregnant woman--pregnant sleepy is so different than regular sleepy! The latter I can power through while the former makes me a dangerous driver.
Other updates: We missed our childbirth class this week due to Peter being in San Francisco and my hell no reaction to when Peter asked me if I was going to sit through it without him. Plus that night's agenda was focused solely on birth plans and my birth plan is woefully underwhelming. Well that coupled with a doctor and a hospital that, according to the business of being born, is shockingly pro-natural, pro-doula, pro-parent choices and would make Ina Garten proud. My hospital insists on an hour of skin to skin contact, immediate latching, delay of any and all newborn tasks (including weight and eyedrops) until parents feel bonded. My ob won't cut the cord until it stops pulsing, encourages breastfeeding (mind over matter was her phrasing), and is willing to wait on inductions until around 42 weeks. I have in my drafted birth plan to keep the baby in the nursery as the default instead of in my room and I have to laugh at the irony that I will be going against the "norm" now. I almost think that any specifications on my part would be met with a "Silly girl, we do that for all our patients now". We went on our hospital tour today and was told that mothers are encouraged to walk around, labor on the birthing ball, or labor in the jacuzzi. Such a stark difference when you look back ten or twenty years.
The tour actually got me excited to go into labor if only for the view. Being in a high rise hospital room with huge windows that face the wasatch front makes me feel luckier than Beyonce.
Question of the week: When did you put your car seats in your cars? We're planning on visiting the local fire station to make sure we install the bases correctly. Waiting until 38 weeks or so seems reasonable to me but is that too early?
31 Weeks
Dear Baby,
This is the part of the third trimester that feels like deja vu. First trimester fatigue and day naps are back in full force. This combined with a renewed interest in my job and long hours spent at the office create an interesting dynamic. I wonder what parental leave/work policy will be the norm when you are having your own children and wonder how our society can continue to ask parents to keep their jobs and raise children at the same time. I have always thought that women could have both, if not simultaneously, then sequentially. Now, however, that decision is more personal than academic and I can't help but wish that Utah, of all states, would have friendlier parenting policies.
I can see the writing on the wall for the traditional 9-to-5 work day in an office--this new generation of workers value flexibility and commute options almost above more pay. I absolutely concur--I would gladly take a pay reduction if it meant I could set my own hours or bring my children into work or even subsidize a child care center on-site.
Maybe things won't be that different in twenty years but I hope that parents, and especially mothers, continue to have greater and greater options when trying to balance work and family. I especially wish your father could experience being a stay-at-home-parent or a hybrid sahp/worker. I think you would both enjoy that.
Love (with or without all my philosophical musings),
Mama
This is the part of the third trimester that feels like deja vu. First trimester fatigue and day naps are back in full force. This combined with a renewed interest in my job and long hours spent at the office create an interesting dynamic. I wonder what parental leave/work policy will be the norm when you are having your own children and wonder how our society can continue to ask parents to keep their jobs and raise children at the same time. I have always thought that women could have both, if not simultaneously, then sequentially. Now, however, that decision is more personal than academic and I can't help but wish that Utah, of all states, would have friendlier parenting policies.
I can see the writing on the wall for the traditional 9-to-5 work day in an office--this new generation of workers value flexibility and commute options almost above more pay. I absolutely concur--I would gladly take a pay reduction if it meant I could set my own hours or bring my children into work or even subsidize a child care center on-site.
Maybe things won't be that different in twenty years but I hope that parents, and especially mothers, continue to have greater and greater options when trying to balance work and family. I especially wish your father could experience being a stay-at-home-parent or a hybrid sahp/worker. I think you would both enjoy that.
Love (with or without all my philosophical musings),
Mama
Thursday, January 26, 2012
30 Week Stats
Baby Size: 3 and a half pounds ish
Mama Size: Still at 21.5 pounds. I have been sick and stressed this week and so actually lost some weight. My stomach continues to grow--38 inches now!
Symptoms: Having a hard time falling asleep but usually when I do, I stay asleep except for maybe one bathroom trip. Although last night I had to get up four times so that.....was just lovely. I am loving the weekends because when my alarm doesn't wake me up, I can sleep in until 10. Pelvic pain has now been joined by hip and back pain. Gotta love the third trimester.
Other updates: The second childbirth class was hard to sit through but three hours on a hard chair=major discomfort. Peter learned some coaching techniques but I made it difficult because I kept laughing which would make him laugh. We just fail at relaxing.
Nursery is so close to being done. We set up the dresser and cleaned out the closet and organized the tons of baby stuff we already have. I want a bookshelf and some wall shelves and a few other odds and ends in there but as Peter put it, the baby doesn't care whether I have spackled the crown molding.
Question of the Week: When did you choose a pediatrician, or did you choose a family practitioner instead? Someone told me I'd need one before giving birth but my ob told me I didn't. Hmm...
Mama Size: Still at 21.5 pounds. I have been sick and stressed this week and so actually lost some weight. My stomach continues to grow--38 inches now!
Symptoms: Having a hard time falling asleep but usually when I do, I stay asleep except for maybe one bathroom trip. Although last night I had to get up four times so that.....was just lovely. I am loving the weekends because when my alarm doesn't wake me up, I can sleep in until 10. Pelvic pain has now been joined by hip and back pain. Gotta love the third trimester.
Other updates: The second childbirth class was hard to sit through but three hours on a hard chair=major discomfort. Peter learned some coaching techniques but I made it difficult because I kept laughing which would make him laugh. We just fail at relaxing.
Nursery is so close to being done. We set up the dresser and cleaned out the closet and organized the tons of baby stuff we already have. I want a bookshelf and some wall shelves and a few other odds and ends in there but as Peter put it, the baby doesn't care whether I have spackled the crown molding.
Question of the Week: When did you choose a pediatrician, or did you choose a family practitioner instead? Someone told me I'd need one before giving birth but my ob told me I didn't. Hmm...
30 Weeks
Dear Baby,
I feel like we've reached a milestone--75% finished! I hope you are not getting too comfortable because I am beginning to think that your comfort and mine are inversely proportional.
We set up most of the nursery this week and I satisfied some nesting urge now that I finally have a place to put the onesies and the footed pajamas and the ever-growing pile of baby blankets. I made you an origami mobile and had to glare at your father when he made jokes about one thousand paper cranes.
At our childbirth class this week, the instructor encouraged us to keep a journal for you (check), play with you (does pushing your body parts to more comfortable jabbing places count?), and talk to you. Your dad pounced on that last one with glee and told me he is now justified for yelling, "BABY COME OUT NOW AND EAT SOME ICE CREAM" at my stomach intermittently throughout the day. I am not sure if it terrifies you or calms you down at this point but you always go quiet and then start to tentatively kick me again.
We are in the middle of the Chinese New Year and like every child born this year, you will be a dragon. Which is much cooler than my sign; I was always dismayed every time I remembered mine was an ox. According to our Chinese friend, a dragon is the best sign there is and according to wikipedia, the year of the dragon is the luckiest year of them all. The dragon is considered to be powerful, strong, and full of good luck. I hope all those things for you
Love,
Mama
I feel like we've reached a milestone--75% finished! I hope you are not getting too comfortable because I am beginning to think that your comfort and mine are inversely proportional.
We set up most of the nursery this week and I satisfied some nesting urge now that I finally have a place to put the onesies and the footed pajamas and the ever-growing pile of baby blankets. I made you an origami mobile and had to glare at your father when he made jokes about one thousand paper cranes.
At our childbirth class this week, the instructor encouraged us to keep a journal for you (check), play with you (does pushing your body parts to more comfortable jabbing places count?), and talk to you. Your dad pounced on that last one with glee and told me he is now justified for yelling, "BABY COME OUT NOW AND EAT SOME ICE CREAM" at my stomach intermittently throughout the day. I am not sure if it terrifies you or calms you down at this point but you always go quiet and then start to tentatively kick me again.
We are in the middle of the Chinese New Year and like every child born this year, you will be a dragon. Which is much cooler than my sign; I was always dismayed every time I remembered mine was an ox. According to our Chinese friend, a dragon is the best sign there is and according to wikipedia, the year of the dragon is the luckiest year of them all. The dragon is considered to be powerful, strong, and full of good luck. I hope all those things for you
Love,
Mama
Thursday, January 19, 2012
29 Week Stats
Baby Size: It starts getting much more fuzzy and guesstimating from here on out. But getting closer to 3 pounds?
Mama Size: I really don't understand pregnancy weight gain. Yesterday I hadn't gained any weight from the week before but today I'm up 1.5 pounds. In one day. Peter just laughs and tells me it can't be due to me eating a half bar of chocolate last night but I don't believe him. And what is up with my troll body wanting chocolate candy? We have those chocolate covered pomegranates in our theater room for guests and I was slowly savoring each one I ate last night. They usually make me gag! Anyways, total weight gain so far: 21.5 pounds. Waist size: 37.5 inches
Symptoms: Well I think she has changed positions and I think her head has dropped down. I feel soft movements under my ribs but more telling is that I haven't had heartburn ALL week! YES! Also I can usually sleep through the night without needing to go to the bathroom. Another huge win. I found some stretching exercises that help me sit through my work day and haven't gone home early all week. Wow, this is what the second trimester was supposed to feel like :)
And I'm nesting like craaaaazy. If it wasn't for the fact that working on the house for more than ~4 hours gives me pelvic pain, I'd be doing even more. As it is, I hear the voice chanting inside me to clean the fridge, organize my crafting room, wipe the baseboards, hang ALL the paintings!!!!!! Please tell me I'm not the only one who hears a nesting voice.......
Ok fine. Moving on.
Other updates: We bought the nursery dresser and will be assembling it this weekend. I am this close to pulling the trigger on some cloth diapers. I was going to buy these easy-peasy all-in-ones but I find myself drawn to prefolds and covers. Maybe because it seems more like what I do during times when I need, what, leakage protection? Ha. But it just makes so much sense to buy absorbent cloth that can double up and then to pin something waterproof over that. Plus I have a HE front load washer and I'm pretty sure for all-in-ones you want a top loader. Guess that will be my QOTW--how did you diaper your kid and why?
Anyways, other big update was that we went to our first birthing class this week. Oh. Boy. My doctor and doula (and random bloggers I read) recommended the hypnobirthing method so we signed up for a 4 week course at the hospital where I'll deliver. Peter and I are apparently too cynical for our own good so if you are considering hypnobirthing, you will probably have a totally different experience.
Anyways, we walk into a room with about 10 other couples and an instructor who EMBODIED the sweet, girlish, high pitched voice of Dolores Umbridge without the sadism and with an extra dose of enthusiasm. So that was....an affront to our ears but towards the end of the 3 hour class I actually was warming up to her. She is a head nurse at the hospital so it is likely we'll run into her again.
The bigger problem was a couple in the room who were pregnant with their third and according to them, had had the worst experience delivering their first two. I understand that bad doctors and nurses are more memorable and perhaps more common than you'd like, but after awhile, their complaints were just so annoying (also, if you hate hospitals so much, why are you delivering in one again? Try a birth center next time!!!!). And when they weren't complaining they were interjecting their own stories every chance they got. Peter and I were not impressed.
And then some of the instruction was just so left field. Example: Gentle births lead to gentle people. No they don't. Temperament is one of the most innate characteristics that a child brings to the table. Or: A medicated birth doesn't release the love hormone and what happens to a society where that love hormone doesn't get released?! What the.....seriously? Oxytocin gets released when you breastfeed, when you touch people, when you smell your baby. I mean, societies are not going to crumble if people miss out on one opportunity to feel that hormone.
Or the one I have the most trouble with: Hypnobirthing means no pain during labor. I'm not even going to dignify that one.
The reason we are going to finish the course is because I DO believe that their relaxation techniques can be helpful in any situation where one feels pain. I have listened to the cd before bedtime and every night, it is easier and easier to "slip away" so to speak. It is helpful for me to listen to someone else direct my thoughts, if that makes sense. When a voice (a real one this time!) is telling me to think of a rainbow, it's more effective than if I tell myself to think of one.
So yeah, I am not an ideal customer especially because I am not against medication and I am all for the drugs if these techniques and willpower are overpowered by sheer exhaustion or pain. But I am going to try! And that's good enough for me.
Question of the Week: Cloth diapers (see above). Also, do you think that 3 dozen prefolds and 4 covers will cut it?
Mama Size: I really don't understand pregnancy weight gain. Yesterday I hadn't gained any weight from the week before but today I'm up 1.5 pounds. In one day. Peter just laughs and tells me it can't be due to me eating a half bar of chocolate last night but I don't believe him. And what is up with my troll body wanting chocolate candy? We have those chocolate covered pomegranates in our theater room for guests and I was slowly savoring each one I ate last night. They usually make me gag! Anyways, total weight gain so far: 21.5 pounds. Waist size: 37.5 inches
Symptoms: Well I think she has changed positions and I think her head has dropped down. I feel soft movements under my ribs but more telling is that I haven't had heartburn ALL week! YES! Also I can usually sleep through the night without needing to go to the bathroom. Another huge win. I found some stretching exercises that help me sit through my work day and haven't gone home early all week. Wow, this is what the second trimester was supposed to feel like :)
And I'm nesting like craaaaazy. If it wasn't for the fact that working on the house for more than ~4 hours gives me pelvic pain, I'd be doing even more. As it is, I hear the voice chanting inside me to clean the fridge, organize my crafting room, wipe the baseboards, hang ALL the paintings!!!!!! Please tell me I'm not the only one who hears a nesting voice.......
Ok fine. Moving on.
Other updates: We bought the nursery dresser and will be assembling it this weekend. I am this close to pulling the trigger on some cloth diapers. I was going to buy these easy-peasy all-in-ones but I find myself drawn to prefolds and covers. Maybe because it seems more like what I do during times when I need, what, leakage protection? Ha. But it just makes so much sense to buy absorbent cloth that can double up and then to pin something waterproof over that. Plus I have a HE front load washer and I'm pretty sure for all-in-ones you want a top loader. Guess that will be my QOTW--how did you diaper your kid and why?
Anyways, other big update was that we went to our first birthing class this week. Oh. Boy. My doctor and doula (and random bloggers I read) recommended the hypnobirthing method so we signed up for a 4 week course at the hospital where I'll deliver. Peter and I are apparently too cynical for our own good so if you are considering hypnobirthing, you will probably have a totally different experience.
Anyways, we walk into a room with about 10 other couples and an instructor who EMBODIED the sweet, girlish, high pitched voice of Dolores Umbridge without the sadism and with an extra dose of enthusiasm. So that was....an affront to our ears but towards the end of the 3 hour class I actually was warming up to her. She is a head nurse at the hospital so it is likely we'll run into her again.
The bigger problem was a couple in the room who were pregnant with their third and according to them, had had the worst experience delivering their first two. I understand that bad doctors and nurses are more memorable and perhaps more common than you'd like, but after awhile, their complaints were just so annoying (also, if you hate hospitals so much, why are you delivering in one again? Try a birth center next time!!!!). And when they weren't complaining they were interjecting their own stories every chance they got. Peter and I were not impressed.
And then some of the instruction was just so left field. Example: Gentle births lead to gentle people. No they don't. Temperament is one of the most innate characteristics that a child brings to the table. Or: A medicated birth doesn't release the love hormone and what happens to a society where that love hormone doesn't get released?! What the.....seriously? Oxytocin gets released when you breastfeed, when you touch people, when you smell your baby. I mean, societies are not going to crumble if people miss out on one opportunity to feel that hormone.
Or the one I have the most trouble with: Hypnobirthing means no pain during labor. I'm not even going to dignify that one.
The reason we are going to finish the course is because I DO believe that their relaxation techniques can be helpful in any situation where one feels pain. I have listened to the cd before bedtime and every night, it is easier and easier to "slip away" so to speak. It is helpful for me to listen to someone else direct my thoughts, if that makes sense. When a voice (a real one this time!) is telling me to think of a rainbow, it's more effective than if I tell myself to think of one.
So yeah, I am not an ideal customer especially because I am not against medication and I am all for the drugs if these techniques and willpower are overpowered by sheer exhaustion or pain. But I am going to try! And that's good enough for me.
Question of the Week: Cloth diapers (see above). Also, do you think that 3 dozen prefolds and 4 covers will cut it?
29 Weeks
Dear Baby,
I am pretty sure that if I read this post in three months, I'll want to cry but here it is: A (weekend) day in the life of a DINK couple. This was last Sunday for us.
I am pretty sure that if I read this post in three months, I'll want to cry but here it is: A (weekend) day in the life of a DINK couple. This was last Sunday for us.
- I woke up at 10 am and read on my ipad until I got hungry
- Made myself some toast with laughing cow cheese
- Peter woke up around 11 and browsed the web on my laptop while I read a book on my ipad
- Around 1, got a text from our cousins asking us to go out to lunch
- Ate a burger at Red Rock with them and their two girls
- Around 3, we go home and do some house chores
- Then I cleaned out about half the boxes in the nursery closet
- And threw some leftover chicken bones in the crockpot to make stock
- Then I watched your dad clean the floors
- Around 6? we ate dinner which I can't seem to recall. I think I wasn't feeling too good so I had some soup.
- Then I climbed into bed and watched netflix until I fell asleep (around midnight) while your dad came to bed shortly after
It sounds so boring but it was the kind of day we love the most--spending hours of quiet time with each other with nothing to stress over. It is hard to fit days like this in when we are usually so busy with house projects or social things or work. And while I am not sad to be trading this for a life filled with children, it will be nice (and probably funny) to look back on and remember.
Love
Mama
Thursday, January 12, 2012
28 Week Stats
Baby Size: Over two pounds now
Mama Size: Up 20 pounds with a 37 inch waist. Some of Peter's shirts are tight on me now....
Symptoms: Well after some seriously can't-walk-can't-move-to-get-out-of-bed pelvic pain this weekend, it seems to have died down. But it's sneaky troll pain and I'm sure it will be back with a vengeance.
Heartburn has also subsided thank goodness. I still pop Tums at night just in case.
Hormones were out of control for a few days this week. Seriously, crying for nothing, getting angry over nothing. It was like I was watching someone experience PMS for the first time. Luckily Peter thinks it's funny
And I wasn't expecting this one but my first trimester nausea has come back. Luckily never strong enough to make me throw up.
Overall a pretty good week though
Other updates: Peter and I painted the nursery this week and our light grey color turned out blue! But I adore it. It is a really cute color. We need to put up crown molding, paint closet doors and trim, and put up some wall stencils still but hopefully we have plenty of time to finish it.
We start our birthing class on Monday and while I'm glad we're doing it, I am beginning to reconsider my pro-natural inclinations. I've never really felt strongly either pro or anti epidurals, especially since I can't find any solid research that epidurals are harmful. I think my plan right now is to get through the first 5 cm without meds and then to probably get an epi for the next 5. My doula will be so disappointed in me. :)
Question of the week: What made you decide to do an epidural or not?
Mama Size: Up 20 pounds with a 37 inch waist. Some of Peter's shirts are tight on me now....
Symptoms: Well after some seriously can't-walk-can't-move-to-get-out-of-bed pelvic pain this weekend, it seems to have died down. But it's sneaky troll pain and I'm sure it will be back with a vengeance.
Heartburn has also subsided thank goodness. I still pop Tums at night just in case.
Hormones were out of control for a few days this week. Seriously, crying for nothing, getting angry over nothing. It was like I was watching someone experience PMS for the first time. Luckily Peter thinks it's funny
And I wasn't expecting this one but my first trimester nausea has come back. Luckily never strong enough to make me throw up.
Overall a pretty good week though
Other updates: Peter and I painted the nursery this week and our light grey color turned out blue! But I adore it. It is a really cute color. We need to put up crown molding, paint closet doors and trim, and put up some wall stencils still but hopefully we have plenty of time to finish it.
We start our birthing class on Monday and while I'm glad we're doing it, I am beginning to reconsider my pro-natural inclinations. I've never really felt strongly either pro or anti epidurals, especially since I can't find any solid research that epidurals are harmful. I think my plan right now is to get through the first 5 cm without meds and then to probably get an epi for the next 5. My doula will be so disappointed in me. :)
Question of the week: What made you decide to do an epidural or not?
28 Weeks
Conversations with your father
Me: Another thing we'll need to take to the hospital are diapers
Dad: Can't we just buy those after she gets here?
Me: Not for her, for me!
Dead silence and then muffled laughing
Dad: What do we need to get at the grocery store?
Me: Eggs, milk, bread
Dad: Are you crying right now?
Me: Yeah. I have no idea why
Until next week
Love,
Mama
Me: Another thing we'll need to take to the hospital are diapers
Dad: Can't we just buy those after she gets here?
Me: Not for her, for me!
Dead silence and then muffled laughing
Dad: What do we need to get at the grocery store?
Me: Eggs, milk, bread
Dad: Are you crying right now?
Me: Yeah. I have no idea why
Until next week
Love,
Mama
Friday, January 6, 2012
27 Week Stats
Baby Size: Closer to 2 pounds now
Mama Size: Up 18 pounds. Probably some sneaky holiday weight thrown in there. I need to get back on the exercise bike!
Symptoms: Oh this week was a doozy. I was eating Tums like crazy and having so much acid reflux that I didn't want to eat. Except then my stomach would grumble and OH MY GOSH it feels so good to feel my digestive organs working. Weirdly enough, soup doesn't seem to trigger heartburn or reflux so my poor child has been subjected to more ramen than I care to admit.
My pelvic pain has come back and I'm finding it very hard to sit all day long in the office. I'm not sure if swapping to another chair will help but I'm going to try that next. On bad nights, I get home and crawl into bed with tylenol and a heating pad. I swear, this relaxin crap had better be doing some good.
I mentioned my incessant night hunger. I don't think I'll ever forget how ludicrous I feel trying to eat while trying not to wake up.
Other updates: Yay third trimester! It's kind of weird but I feel my desire to prepare for this baby diminishing every day. I was doing all this research on baby products that I think I burned myself out. There is way too much information out there
Question of the week: What was your last trimester like? I am kind of dreading the increase in discomfort
Mama Size: Up 18 pounds. Probably some sneaky holiday weight thrown in there. I need to get back on the exercise bike!
Symptoms: Oh this week was a doozy. I was eating Tums like crazy and having so much acid reflux that I didn't want to eat. Except then my stomach would grumble and OH MY GOSH it feels so good to feel my digestive organs working. Weirdly enough, soup doesn't seem to trigger heartburn or reflux so my poor child has been subjected to more ramen than I care to admit.
My pelvic pain has come back and I'm finding it very hard to sit all day long in the office. I'm not sure if swapping to another chair will help but I'm going to try that next. On bad nights, I get home and crawl into bed with tylenol and a heating pad. I swear, this relaxin crap had better be doing some good.
I mentioned my incessant night hunger. I don't think I'll ever forget how ludicrous I feel trying to eat while trying not to wake up.
Other updates: Yay third trimester! It's kind of weird but I feel my desire to prepare for this baby diminishing every day. I was doing all this research on baby products that I think I burned myself out. There is way too much information out there
Question of the week: What was your last trimester like? I am kind of dreading the increase in discomfort
Thursday, January 5, 2012
27 Weeks
Dear Baby,
I think you went through another growth spurt this week. I would wake up in the middle of the night, stumble to the kitchen without turning on any lights, eat a slice of bread and drink some milk with my eyes closed, and fall back into bed.
It is hard to believe that you will be here in three short months. Part of me is impatient and unsure of how much more daily pain I can take (although as if to give me a reprieve, I haven't had debilitating pelvic pains for the last couple of days) and part of me is wishing this will never end. I told your dad that I can't imagine being happier than we are right now even though I know that we will be even happier once you get here.
Love,
Mama
I think you went through another growth spurt this week. I would wake up in the middle of the night, stumble to the kitchen without turning on any lights, eat a slice of bread and drink some milk with my eyes closed, and fall back into bed.
It is hard to believe that you will be here in three short months. Part of me is impatient and unsure of how much more daily pain I can take (although as if to give me a reprieve, I haven't had debilitating pelvic pains for the last couple of days) and part of me is wishing this will never end. I told your dad that I can't imagine being happier than we are right now even though I know that we will be even happier once you get here.
Love,
Mama
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